What Women Want In Sex And Wish Men Knew 2023

Updated: February 3, 2023

Figuring out what women want in sex oftentimes comes down to paying attention to non-verbal cues, as well as conversations with your partner. But don’t worry, we’ve done some of the work for you when it comes to finding out exactly what women want!

1. Pay Attention To Non-Verbal Cues

Pella Weisman, a dating coach, and Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, says she hears stories over and over again about how men are just not responding to the signals that women send. Learn to be a responsive, tuned-in lover and you will gain serious appreciation from your partner.

2. Foreplay And Afterplay

For a lot of men, penetration is the goal when it comes to sex. For women, however, we need more foreplay. This isn’t necessarily about what women want in sex, so much as what we need in order to relax and be able to enjoy the festivities to come. Give us touching, teasing, lots of kissing, nibbling, and eye contact. You’ll find the more you rev up our engines before taking off, the more fun there is to be had for everyone involved.

3. Explore Ignored Hot Spots

Before, during, and even after sex, exploring often ignored hot spots can bring pleasure you’ve never considered. A sensual touch on your partner’s lower back. Lightly running your fingers across the back of their knees. Paying close attention to more unexplored parts of the body, with light flicks of your tongue, short breaths across them, and careful nibbles.

4. Talk Dirty to Her

Some women don’t care for dirty talk and that’s okay. But those who do, absolutely love it. Try whispering naughty things to your partner while you’re leaning in close during sex. See how they react. Turn it up a notch each time and gauge their reaction.

5. Worship Her, Not Just Her Orgasm

We all love to hear compliments, but take a moment to tell your partner something more. Worship how much she means to you, what her body does to you. Tell her how she makes your life better.

6. Don’t Stop At Lingerie

It’s great to receive lingerie as a gift. But when asked what they prefer from their partner, most replied something other than sexy items. Cute socks, soft blankets, flowers for no reason, gift certificates to her favorite spa, and other non-sexual items topped most lists.

7. Bring Toys To Bed

There’s nothing wrong with adding a little spice to your sex life and sex toys can do just that. A study published in the Journal of Sex Research found that bringing a toy to bed can lead to multiple orgasms in half of all female users. Those are pretty stellar odds.


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