Updated: February 1, 2023
1. Don’t meet the kids unless you’re serious about this guy
It’s always a bad idea to meet the kids too early, because there’s a huge risk you and them will bond. It’s unfair to put kids through the emotional roller coaster of having someone new in their life they grow attached to, then having them taken away. They’ve already dealt with their parents breaking up, or worse still, losing a parent, so they don’t need any more on their plate.
2. Remember, his kids will always come first
The guy you’re dating might have full custody of his kids, or he might be a widow and therefore be their full-time carer. And even if he only sees them on the weekends, things are likely to crop up now and then that affects your relationship. So make sure you’re okay with knowing that his kids will always be his number one priority ahead of you.
3. Get clear on whether you still want to have kids of your own
When someone has already been through the stages of having a family, they may not want any more kids. So it’s important that you figure out whether that’s something you might want down the line, and have that conversation with him early on.
4. There is an ex to deal with
This might be the guy’s ex-girlfriend, or wife, or even someone he hooked up with just a few times. On top of that, things may not have ended on great terms. But regardless of their past relationship, she is their kids’ mother, which means she will be present in your life whether you like her or not.
5. It’ll take the kids some time to get used to you
It’s really hard for kids to accept that their parents are no longer together, and to see them move on and date other people. Imagine if that happened to you when you were younger? You might not even have to imagine.
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