Updated: August 10, 2022
Trying to get a woman’s attention while online dating can be rough. There’s a lot of competition and the pressure is on you to break the ice and get things started. So how can you stand out from the crowd without looking like you’re trying too hard?
1. When in doubt, talk about the weather.
This one may seem counter intuitive. After all, what could be more mundane than the weather? But according to the data, first messages with the word weather get 39% more replies from women. And if the weather is bad, it’s even better for you. Messages with the word rain get 20% more messages, while sun actually gets 6% fewer messages than the average. The reason? It’s hard to say.
2. Don’t bother saying hello.
Wait… what? No hello? That’s right. According to Zoosk data, using a greeting like hello or hi actually gets you fewer messages. Saying hey gets you 35% fewer messages.
– Saying howdy gets you 19% fewer messages.
– Saying hello gets you 21% fewer messages.
3. If you’re going to ask her out right away, make sure she’s free first.
A lot of guys like to go straight for the date in the first message, but you might be better served by feeling her out first. Being confident and coming on strong can work sometimes. But, according to the data, asking someone to go out in a first message gets you 56% fewer responses, and using the word date gets you 14% fewer messages. Yikes.
4. Ask about her profile, not her photos.
It’s great to mention a woman’s profile but don’t make her feel like you’re only interested in her looks. First messages that mention a woman’s profile get 12% more messages than the average. But mention her photo and you’ll get 25% fewer messages.
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